“I am the Wifi, you are the Netflix” by Brian Flanagan

“I am the Wifi, you are the Netflix” by Brian Flanagan

Fifth Sunday of Easter

Jesus uses a lot of analogies.  Sometimes we pretend to know what they mean but in reality we’ve only heard them a bunch of times and have never really thought about it.  I wonder if the Apostles struggled with that too…

Jesus: I am the vine, you are the branches.  Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit, because without me you can do nothing.  Anyone who does not remain in me will be thrown out like a branch and wither; people will gather them and throw them into a fire and they will be burned.  If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask for whatever you want and it will be done for you.  By this is my Father glorified, that you bear much fruit and become my disciples.

Peter: Sorry Jesus, can you give that to us one more time? We’re not really following.

Jesus: Really guys?  I thought that was pretty clever actually, using an analogy that you could relate to since you’re familiar with the whole vine – branches – grapes – wine thing…especially you Thaddeus (wink, wink).

Peter: Well I mean I was sort of following, but let’s say Johnny here writes all these one-liners down one day, how are people in the future going to get this when they sell wine in the liquor store and buy grapes in the supermarket?  I don’t think it’s going to fly.

Jesus: Alright, fine, fine.  I am the Wifi, you are the Netflix.  Whoever connects to me and I to him will binge-watch many seasons of sitcoms.  Anyone who does not connect to me will be forced to read a book…

Thomas: I doubt that’s going to get your point across either, Jesus.

Pete: Thomas, why do you always have to doubt everything?  That’s gonna come back to bite you some day.  I think it makes perfect sense.

Jesus: Okay well how about this one then.  I am the outlet, you are the extension cords.  Whoever plugs in to me will use many power tools.  Anyone who does not plug in to me will have to use the tiny screwdriver on their Swiss Army knife.

Philip: What if they have a cordless drill?

Jesus: Ugh.  Fine, I am the Keurig, you are the K-cup.  Whoever is placed in me will brew great coffee.  Anyone who is not placed in me will only be able to be played as tiny maracas.

Bartholomew: Finally, I get it.

Jesus: I don’t even know what I’m talking about anymore.  Here’s the point (and you can think about whichever analogy you want).  If you want to live out your faith and have an impact on others, you need to stay close and connected to me.  If you’re not praying, you’re not going to be very effective in helping other people to pray.  If you try to do anything spiritually impacting on your own steam, not relying on me, you might be okay for a while, but eventually you’ll burn out.  You need to stay connected.  I need you to be my hands and feet in the world, but you need me to be the head, to guide you and direct you.  Now how about this one: I am the Bread of Life…

Andrew: Sorry, Jesus, but I’m gluten free…

Jesus:  Forget it guys, we’re done for today.  Pass the hummus.